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Heads or Tails

16 Feb

Deut. 28:13 The LORD will make you the head, not the tail. If you pay attention to the commands of the LORD your God that I give you this day and carefully follow them, you will always be at the top, never at the bottom.

I’m whining tonight. “Lord I’m tired of being the tail, instead of the head.” When it hits me like a ton of bricks. Who am I to complain about where I am in the body? Jesus is the true head. Not me. The “flesh me” longs for more honor, or at least more money. But there’s a part of me, my spirit woman, that says “Lord, you’re the potter, I’m the clay. Make me whatever you want. If you want to make me the eye, or the ear, or the pinkie toe, or that world-domination eyebrow hair that won’t stay in place and everyone who looks at it thinks man, ever hear of scissors; and yes even the tail, then that is your prerogative. You’re God, not me. Make me whatever works in your grand plan.”

It is a constant wrestling match between spirit woman and the 600 lb. sumo “flesh woman” wrestler. Some days spirit woman wins hands down, some days she wins only after a long match, and other days she’s defeated, ready to give up. This year of unemployment and illness has certainly drawn me to God like the deer panting for water. I don’t want to give that up. I want to keep following hard after God. If I must remain in lowly circumstances, everyone else’s missions project, so that I can keep this fire and passion for God…then so be it. I don’t want to get so comfortable that I forget God. So comfortable that I can go through my day without giving Him a second thought.

Of course I would rather have the easy life and still be passionate for Jesus. That would be way more fun. But only God knows if I can handle a life of ease. Jesus said it’s easier for a camel to go thru the eye of a needle than it is for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God. Who then can enter? The meek, the lowly, the one who relies on God for his daily bread. You can learn to live that way when you are rich…but it’s far easier when you are not. So I guess I really do have the easy life. 😉

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Posted by on February 16, 2012 in Uncategorized

 

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